A revelation/realization between God and I

Ok, so last week I attended the first meeting of many to come for the new Girl's Group that's going on at Sr. high. Part of the requirements for the group is that the day of the meeting we are all supposed to fast from 6 am-6 pm, and, at some point during the day, set aside AT LEAST an hour to just pray and read our Bibles and worship alone, away from all distractions. The fasting part went fast and easily for me, as I thought the devotion time would as well. But that hour was the longest hour of my entire life, so it seemed. I could not, even for a minute, focus on praying, reading, singing, or whatever else I tried. My mind was RACING faster than the Indy 500, planning out what had to be done once I was done with that hour, as well as thinking over the next week(s) to come! I finally had to give up and do some cooking while I prayed, becuase it was the only thing I could do to even semi-focus!

I had the same problem that night as we all got together to talk about how things went, and then pray for half an hour. I could not focus for ANYTHING! Finally, in the middle of our group prayer time, while I was laying on the couch in the corner of the youth center, I silently cried out to God, begging Him to help calm down my mind and help me to focus!!! And finally, God did what He does so often with me, and He started laying songs on my heart, one by one, and it started with "Unashamed Love" by Ten Shekel Shirt:

"You're calling me to lay aside the worries of my day
To quiet down my busy mind and find a hiding place
Worthy, You are Worthy!"

It was just like, "But dude, where?? What hiding place?? Where can I get away from this?? Where ever I go I'm bombarded 24/7, and there's no escape..." And then, He followed it up with "Haven":

"I long to be flown far away from the details that take their toll
I know what I need to embrace is a Haven for my soul!
I long to be flown to the place I can let all my troubles go
I see when I'm wrapped up in You, You're the Haven for my soul!"

And then it hit me: "Wow, ok...all I have to do is fall back on Jesus, my Hiding Place, and rest in His glory and majesty, and HE will be My Hiding Place!" Next came, ironically, the song "Hiding Place":

"You are my Hiding Place
You always fill my heart with songs of delieverance
Whenever I am afraid I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!
Let the weak say I am strong in the strength of my Lord
I will trust in You!"

"Oh my goodness...you mean there was a trust issue going on too?? I haven't been surrendering my life up to You like I should've been! I'm SO sorry, God! Please forgive me, and BRAKE me God! I give it *ALL* up to You!!!"

"When the music fades, and all is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing *just* to bring something that's of worth
That will bless Your heart!

I bring You more than a song, for a song in itself
Is not what You have required
You search MUCH deeper within through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart!

I'm coming back to the heart of worship,
And it's ALL ABOUT YOU, ALL ABOUT YOU JESUS!
I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it,
When it's all about You, ALL ABOUT YOU JESUS!!!"

"And I surrender
All to You, all to You!
And I surrender
All to You! All To You!"

"God, I just pray that over the next week, month, year, and the rest of my life, that You would help me to continue give EVERYTHING up to You, and learn to just rest in Your love and peace and forgiveness! I pray that You would help me grow closer to You through this as well! Father God, also be with everyone else out there who may be struggling with this same thing! I pray that maybe You could bring some of them into my life so that we could be supports for each other and encourage each other in Your spirit! Thank You, Father God, for all You are and all You have been for me, and all You WILL be for me! In Your mighty and awesome name, AMEN!"


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